Jeremy Doku wants to be there for the birth of his first child. That should be the end of it

The baby will always be there. Let us leave aside, for a second, the awful yet very real possibility of complications and tragedy in childbirth, and grant the point. The baby, yes, would be waiting for Doku on his return. That is both true and beside the point.

Doku would not have been there, would not have experienced that moment. He would not have had the shared epiphany with his partner, felt the surge of hormones and emotions, the automatic, pre-rational connection with the baby. It is a hoary old cliche that the birth of a child — particularly your first child — is a life-changing event, but it happens to be true. There is no substitute for being in the room. You can’t get the same effect by hearing the story later.

The fact that we’re even having this conversation is just…I don’t even know. It’s baffling. Your child should take precedence. Period.